Pay attention now
These quick tips are potentially time dependant. I said possibly.
- Practice, Practice, Practice small talk. You’ll need to network.
- Have wealthy parents. Ensure you do not squander this gift purchasing bat-based crime fighting equipment.
- Claim disability benefits *if still exists*
- Write some dance tunes under an assumed name for a quick buck, while you work on promoting your real stuff.
- Introduce whale-song into all your tracks claiming it’s to help a marine biology charity (yes, pocket the dosh). It’s not a lie if you really believe it.
- Buy a drum machine, so what if it’s shit and ruins the live experience? Like you can park in London.
- Join an exciting popular band that already makes money, like the Rolling Stones or something. That’s obvious, you dummy. What are you, stupid or something?
- Wear meat.