Who doesn’t like lists? Who enjoys randomised pointless conjecture regarding Virtual Reality? I do!
With Playstation VR primed for the general public, here’s a selection of game ideas I’ve been desperate to play.
Where are the trailblazing Miyamotos of the VR world? Where are the pioneers giving us experiences we simply cannot imagine? Standing about in a cave or waving a sword around is a cool tech demo, but not exactly a proper game I’ll return to again and again. New technology, same ol’ ideas. Give it time, they will come.
Mmmm, yes, that’s is very good VR.
Here’s the top 5 games I would love to play in Virtual Reality.
So you would like to play a Trash Panic? Find and wear your agreeable comfy slippers and follow this handy guide!
A PS3 game? That was a whole console generation ago? How obscure! I can hear the gasps from here. At some point in time, I suspect we’ll be unable to download old PS3 titles. Plus there’s a good chance you’ve never heard of it.
Wait, so what in the cheesehats is this game?
Trash Panic is dustbin Tetris. Released in 2009 to little fanfare it wasn’t a must-have game. Still isn’t. It is a fun two player game to play against people who have never heard of it. Should be pretty bloody cheap by now too. Brilliantly there was some sort of environmental Captain Planet message mixed into the gameplay, with naughty emissions and eco friendly ways to get rid of the trash; bless ’em.
Trash Panic is a capable single player game, but the following is a guide on how to play it with friends.
We’ve taken two rabid fans and have asked them to put five tough questions to one another.
Meet Gamerdownstreet – Fan of FIFA, please tell us about yourself?
I’d bought both FIFA & PES back in 2005, FIFA was better back then so ever since I’ve been loyal. F*%k these questions. In actual fact, don’t continue reading just go and buy FIFA 17 on XBOX One. I am not biased, screw you reading this right now, how about you go outside for once and enjoy the sunlight? Has Pokémon Go got boring for you already?! Yeah, YOU were probably one of those nerds spending real money on it too. Wait, what am I here for again? Ohhh yeah, FIFA vs PES. Sorry Scott, please go ahead.
Thank you for that rabid, unhinged outburst. Now Scott – Fan of Pro
The golden years of PES brought arcadey football to the small screen and it felt like real football, with through-balls, clever runs and one-twos. I slowly lost interest with both games throughout the years, as the yearly updates took it’s toll and a focus on tedious realism took hold. Last year’s Pro brought me back and I’ve been singing it’s praises ever since.
To be honest, I was a bigger fan of Sensible Soccer, but that went missing a long time ago.
Thanks servers, nice one internet. Now we can’t forget any of the things. No-one can. It’s logged somewhere. This is the future, sunshine.
We’ve grown up in era that records time differently to any other. We are our own surveillance system. The keyboard’s mightier then the pen! Unless there’s a power cut. Of course, we are not the first to witness life changing technology but we are the coolest and most rad, because we can tell everyone, IN CAPS, directly to one another.
Reminds me. I must ask my parents what it was like growing up with the introduction of the magic moving picture boxes. The very same boxes we carry around in our pockets and strap to our eyeballs to enter. We are living in Willy Wonka times.
Technology’s great isn’t it!
What’s it like growing up with computer games and more importantly, what’s next?
What makes a good early access game? How can you trust such a changeable thing? The money could dry up at any time. Endings might be forsaken. No resolution.
Why, that’s an easy questions to answer!
Does the game have a clear roadmap?
I’m glad to say Battle Brothers does indeed have a plan. Good.
Does the game receive regular updates ?
Silence, inaction and a lack of meaningful progression cause mild panic attacks and a faint sadness behind the eyes. Luckily Battle Brothers has received a fair few updates since I last tried checked it out and has been much improved.
So the last question we have…. Is Battle Brothers worth your time?
Last night I went into the big wide world and attempted to play games with real life people in a bar. I’m not proud of myself. Although, I did manage to play a game I’d somehow never heard of before. What is it you cry?
Shooty-ball game. No wait Videoball!
Fair warning: – Booze was involved in this quick look. Also shouting.
I do enjoy a nice isometric town with small people to bother. Let’s bother all the small people. Clicking their little heads. Go on, move… move on my command. Cue mighty laughter.
So you command a police force: The computer game. Wonderful. I really do enjoy these types or games and it’s been a while since I’ve played a decent one. Imperio…. isn’t that a make of car? What a rather silly name.
Ok, let’s talk about why this game pisses me off so much.
Kick Off Revival received a much needed update. Wait, has anyone played it since release? I haven’t. I wonder if they included any bloody game modes? Who knows, it might even be alright.
Hey, do you know when the game media becomes a gibbering wreck for certain games and can’t shut the fuck up about it. Lets see how one of those follow up articles looks when the games without any hype and the game is, in fact, quite shit.
Let’s talk about the forgotten Kick Off Revival. That’s a thing to do, right?
So what’s new? Is the game better? Does my hair look nice today?
What’s this diary thing about? How did it reach part 3? What to know more?
Are you the kind of lunatic that wants to start at the beginning? Part 1 resides here, or if you’re quite sensible and wish to start in the middle, Part 2 is here. In the mood to read a most excellent review of the game? You can check that outhere.
Mei the Assassin joins the drunken survivors comprised of Vix, Lloyd and me, Scott in their wacky (they are most certainly not!) adventures in RimWorld.
A camp has been set up, food prepared and strangely, a collection of Turkeys has been gathered. Somehow no-ones died and chaos has generally been averted. It’s all been quite polite really. Well there was that time they brutally murdered a bloke called Tiger and dumped him round the back of some rubble. It’s been mostly polite.
Reviewing No Mans Skywas a painful process. I understood why groups of people were upset with the results and empathise with the pressures of releasing a game without all the hyped features. It would have been wise to have a friendly sit-down chat with the world, explaining what didn’t make it into the game. That might have defused the situation, even if a few pre-orders might have been cancelled.
No Mans Sky is a game few people would adore and (I suspect) a larger majority might find slightly boring. At least after the initial wonder had worn off. I happen to be one of the people that find pleasure in wandering the galaxy without much focus. This is not a game for everyone. Unfortunately marketing teams don’t care about such things.
So patches will come and new features will be added. Here’s an agreeable list of what I would love to see added to No Mans Sky in the coming months.
Could this be the biggest indie game launch known to (no) man? Years of forthy build up and delays sent the general public into meltdown. Nah, not really. It was a few loud-mouthed people typing into the internet at great pace. I’m pretty sure more sensible game enthusiasts were happy to sit back and wait for the release, but that doesn’t make much of a story.
“Sensible crowd waits patiently for games release without resorting to hyperbole”.
That doesn’t have a good ring to it.
I’ve reached a cataclysmic PC crash situation stopping further exploration, so now’s a good time to talk about…
The hotly anticipated.
Wait for it…..
The flying around in a spaceship for reasons game.
Bears (Brian) Cant Drift: The Wacky Karting game for all you crazy kids.
Once upon a time, the world of gaming was awash with cute mascot kart games. As the years tumbled away, the innocent cynical cash grab of the cute mascot racer fell from favour. In the end, only Mario Kart stood tall with competitors shrugging their shoulders with hands in pockets, smoking around a fiery dustbin.
Let’s check out Bears Can’t Drift… I mean its got a great name and who doesn’t like bears? I do like a neat little karting game.
I’m a huge fan of hype. No wait, i can explain why.
Let’s take a peak at Brian Concarman, who has decided to rush to the shop in a desperate effort to purchase a copy of No Mans Sky.
Brian has just exited his favoured shop clutching a day one copy of critical smash hit No Man’s Sky. He managed to steer clear of the reviews because of the review embargo and had no idea what he was buying because of the marketing. Blimey, look at the excitement!
Rim, Rim, Rim. Rimworld. You might be wise to read Part 1 here, or if you’re the kinky sort, a proper decent old fashioned review here.
Part one introduced us to the incredible team of Lloyd the pissed, Vix the master builder and some other guy as they began a slapdash attempt at survival in a harsh alien environment. Oh, also Gerald the monkey, don’t forget the pet monkey. They had survived a season without any serious problems and now we ask the question.
Rimworld is an unfinished group survival game I’ve spent far too much time on. A loving propa’ review is here.
In an incredible turn of events Rimworld allows you to set up your own scenarios. Joy! We can’t pass this opportunity up. Let’s see what happens when we set the game to it’s more interesting randomised settings. How will our three campers fare in the: –
“The Great Camp”
Tagline – “Three friends go on a camping adventure that will forever change their lives”.